The Den of Beasts- Oxford Preview

by on 28/01/05 at 1:37 pm

Ian Atkins returns to his old club, or rather yet another old club, with a score to settle and a point to prove again! We’ve got some of their old players too. What is this, the basement division or some sort of Deep South wedding where everyone is related to the bride? Or is it just Groundhog day?

Well known fruit and nut case Firoz Kassam fell out with Atkins last season and we poached him. I say poach, more like lightly tossed in garlic. Meanwhile Kassam who has modestly named Oxo’s half finished stadium after himself appointed sex offender Graham Rix only to get bored with him and appoint former River Plate manager Ramon Diaz and a veritable entourage of Argentinians. It must be like Morecambe and Wise in ‘The Magnificent Two’ in the Oxford dressing room. An Argentinian manager who doesn’t speak English and no-ones ever heard of being appointed manager of a struggling basement division club. Who would have thunk it? It’s getting more like ‘Dream Team’ every time I think about it.

Despite rumours of international quality signings (probably spread by Kassam to evade the flak), Diaz has signed only a couple of players. That does include a Uruguayan centre back. Why can’t we sign some Uruguayans? It’s not fair. I’ve always wanted a Uruguayan destroyer in the heart of midfield. This guy was last seen at Barnsley, so don’t expect Carlos (The Giant Turtle) Gamarra.

Oxo are still struggling. Or rather they are doing as badly as everyone else is in this godforsaken division. On paper they have a useful forward in Mooney, who should lift them up from the dross. In practice they are as crap as we are.

Lee Thorpe starts his ban just as Junior finishes his. So that selection takes care of itself. His Imperial Majesty Christian Edwards fell ill on the coach at Orient (shouldn’t have eaten all his sweets before the journey started) and John (Gladiators ready) Anderson will take his place.

Old Man Savage might be fit, but Campbell has impressed so should hold his place on the right putting The Troll ‘s place under threat. Given Atkins’ scorched earth policy home and away he will probably err on the side of caution and keep the team the same as Orient but for Agogo replacing Thorpe. Hunt and Savage are both ex-Oxo and will be fired up. I predict another bore draw, with the possibility of a squeaky winner for either side

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